S.T.R.E.S.S

... yang tiada tandingnya.

An incident took place at the office yesterday. It seems as though the big bosses hates those who are BRAVE enough to raise up opinions and disagreements. In my defence, it is my WELFARE i was protecting.

I am 35 weeks pregnant. Having to work in a hospital setting means, we have to do extra work, they call shifts. In this setting, we have to do Inpatient weekend, ED extended weekend and weekdays, ED night shift and Methadone weekend. Many months ago, after i have given birth to Hamza, some colleagues got pregnant. In the meeting, they requested that all those pregnant will be excluded from doing ANY shifts in the last month of pregnancy. I supported the motion, and granted!

Today, I am 35 weeks pregnant. My due date is on the 3rd of June. So, i guess it is only logical that i wouldn't have to be included in the May schedule for any shift. correct? I am already 9 months pregnant. BUT........

I WAS WRONG!!!!

My name appeared in the list and worse still, the bloody shift falls on the 2nd of May. THAT, my dear readers, is a public holiday. Honestly, I was really upset and frustrated and disgusted and angry. Every word that could describe how devastated I was. So, u think i just sat and wait for the schedule to come out and just hope my name would not be included? NO.

I went to see my immediate superior. She was not very helpful. She said, if I insist that I be excluded from the shift, then I would have to 'Replace' the shift after I come back from my confinement leave. WTF?! So, i was not happy since there was a black and white saying that we do not have to work in the last month of our pregnancy, I referred my case to the biggest boss. The 'Ketua Pegawai'. In the meeting,I reminded her that the other colleagues who were pregnant before me we all excluded from doing any shifts in the last month of their pregnancies. On top of that, I explained to her that I will be 36 weeks pregnant in May, and my due date is just 3 days into June. Plus, I have a very bad back pain and I am under Orthopaedics follow up. She noted. After much discussion, she agreed to excuse me from having to do any shifts in May. I was a happy woman after the meeting. I thanked her for being very understanding of my condition, although I think I do not need to do any explanations about my pregnancy because I am entitled to be excluded. Betul??

So, yes. back to my story. Upon discovering my name in the schedule, whatmore on the date that i am NOT AVAILABLE, i flipped. I was just so angry. I cried so badly. I called the KPF first to ask to see her. But she was away attending a meeting. So, I just sent her a text asking 'why my name was put into the schedule when she's promised me that I do not have to do any shifts'. She replied minutes later saying 'Bulan ni banyak cuti. dan ramai pegawai kena buat shift 3 kali. Jadi kena masuk juga'. I thought that reason was plain rubbish. I looked back at the schedule. 15 pegawai had to do 3 times, and 7 or more has to do only 2 shifts next month. So, I said. WOW!! ramainya!! I thought, if excluding me, all my colleagues will have to do 3 shifts. I obviously could not accept her poor reasonings. Therefore, I sent her another SMS. In the SMS, i said, i am very frustrated and sad over this whole issue. I thought it is plain unfair to have my name in the schedule for the sake of her trying to be just/fair to my other colleagues. BUT at my expense. I am 9 Months pregnant la lady! 

I called the person who prepared the schedule, and after much investigation, I soon understand that it was also him, and the bosses who wanted my name in. Being so frustrated and stressed out, I left for home 30 minutes earlier. [apa, dia ingat aku de marah?]. The boss texted me, around 437pm, wanting to see me. But since i've already left. I just didn't take heed to it and didn't even bother to reply to her sms. The next day, I came into work, I thought the onus is on her to tell me WHY my name is in the schedule, so i did not even bother to go see her. 930 am, received a call from a staff, saying the boss calls for me, urgently. I took my time still. Had my breakfast. And then went to see her.

In the room, there were other bosses as well. My immediate superior and another boss. Those two who i guess shouldn't be there but too busybody to know what happened. So yes. Konon-konon when i came in, muka semua orang masam. hahaha. I made a plain face, as though I did not care to what had happened. So, here goes.

B.boss: Do you know why you are here?

Me: I can guess why.

B.boss: Do you know that I am very unhappy with what you wrote in your SMS?

Me: I will tell you why [starts to cry]. I feel that my welfare as a staff, plus being pregnant is not being well taken care off. You told me, i didn't have to do anymore shifts in May, and yet my name is in included in the schedule. Why? 

B.boss: When is your due date?

Me: I have told you before this. 3rd June

B.boss: what is the date today?

Me: 28th April.

B.boss: So, you will have to do the shift until 3rd of May.

Me: wow, so much for being fair to other people. 3 days is an issue to each of you. haha [i gave a cynical laugh]. I think, if you cannot be fair to your staff, then I would suggest that you don't try to be at all. Please do not give privilege to one group, and then when i got pregnant, I get nothing! None! I told you how Syidah was excluded from doing any shifts in her last month of pregnancy and that was december. Do you remember how many holidays we had last december? And plus the long christmas hols? Do you remember? Do you think this is fair for me?

B.boss: I think you are being very ungrateful. Do you know that I have 15 officers who has to 3 shifts next month and I have to also do 1 shift. I am the KPF here. Other KPF wouldn't even bother to do any shifts. All the other bosses are also doing 2 shifts. So, what are you thinking? We have been very much considerate to all the staff. And I don't get to be appreciated at all. If this is what's going to happen, I think I will revoke whatever privileges there are. Nobody will be excused.

Me: Exactly! That's what I want you to do because I am very frustrated because of this unjust decision making, done on your side. I have also typed in my SMS to you, except that I didn't send it out. I wrote, If the next officers after me who is pregnant, and gets more than what I am getting now, I will definitely make it big. I am so unhappy and I feel 'teraniaya'. Yes!

B.boss: You are very rude!!

P.SS[another boss]: I think you are being very rude. You must show some respect to your boss. For her position and if not for her age.

Me: You have to understand how frustrated I am. You are not in my shoes. Not pregnant. Not a U41. You will never understand!

B.boss: I am more frustrated! You don't know how to be grateful and at least appreciate your boss.

P.SB [Another boss]: What is it that you want?

Me: I am unhappy and frustrated over the schedule.

P.SB: What did i tell you earlier?

Me: You want me to 'ganti' balik the shift if i do not want to do it. I am for god sake 36 weeks pregnant! Dulu, Samantha gave me 4 shifts a month after I came back from my maternity leave. Konon2, i have to make up to the shifts that I have missed during my confinement leave. You tell me how fair is that?!

P.SB: But it was only that 1 time, right?

Me: How could ANY BOSS allow that to happen? I was on leave for 2 months. But the number of shifts I have done is the same with a single unmarried officer. Can you explain to me. That was why I went to see B.boss personally and told her and explained to her. And I just don't get it WHY MY NAME IS IN THE SCHEDULE! 

P.SB: You are still back to that issue. You are rude.

P.SS: No wonder your staff is rude. Just like You.

B.Boss: Yes. That's right.

Me: What has she got to do with this problem anyways?

P.SB: Your staff emulates you and is a reflection of you!

Me: [laughed] and shut up. *I wished I had said, who do I emulate then, out of the 3 of you? hahahah. Surely I emulate one of the bosses. 

B.boss: You are a very good staff. I am very much shocked with what had happened. 

P.SS: If you feel that you cannot do the shifts, I suggest you apply for a transfer.

Me: Well, honestly I am considering that. It's not the shifts that i care about. It's the unfair treatment I am getting here.

B.boss: do you have anything else to say?

Me: *quiet. Malas. 

*after much lecture from the smaller bosses about how kind and generous my boss has been to all the staff, the meeting was dismissed. P.SS came to me, asking me to apologize to the B.boss. I had to do because afterall, I kan orang bawahan. So, yes. I apologized. She too apologized because she has many a times, overlooked issues such as this. 

The moral of the story here is, when you are a boss, it is very important that you be a very good one. One that can provide protection, one who can be just to each of the staff. And one that can be a very-very good manager. It is also important to protect the welfare of the staff. Sebab at the end of the day, it still matters. To some, this is only a very small issue. But, mind you, every small issues, when being handled very poorly will turn into a big one. And i guess, the b.boss, she's been dismissing this issue so much until it has come to this stage. 

I am basically very much stressed. still. But, I am very much praying for Allah's mercy to help me be at ease and help me feel better.

Hujan yang tidak berhenti

The sky is less dull now and looks brighter. Hopefully it won't rain tonight. Tak dapat nak pergi mana-mana sebab air sungai melimpah. The husband's car will not make it through. Best juga berehat-rehat di rumah. Hamza slept for 3 and a half hours. Amazing! But i worry Hamza won't settle in for the night. Huhuhuh.. 

Dah berkurun tidak meng-update. A lot has happened. First, I am already 32 weeks pregnant (tomorrow, I mean). InsyaAllah expecting another baby boy. We already have a name for this second little caliph of ours. 3 doctors confirmed that it is going to be a boy. So, insyaAllah.. Another boy it is. I did hope it'd be a girl.  hehehe.. But as long the little one is healthy and doing well inside of me, I am more than grateful. The baby is due to come out early June this year. Unfortunately, I have yet to start making preparations for this little one. New clothes, new tilam, mittens and booties, and some other newborn stuff. Harusla membuat persediaan soon. This time around, all checkup is done at the place I am working. And we also want the baby to be delivered there. We are definitely praying for a smooth-sailing delivery this time around. Just like how we had when I delivered Hamza.

Second is, we have finally gotten our house key last November. Alhamdulillah. Now, we are busy preparing the house for us to live in. At the moment, we have had the wardrobe and kitchen cabinet installed. We've also had the parquets polished! It looked a lot better than it was before. We've also had the fridge and washing machine delivered. Hah! And not to forget the Hob and Hood. Yes, we are very much happy with the outcome of all the decisions that we have made. The only thing left is we have yet to find a nice bed. This is a very tricky issue. I've always liked a wooden bed. The husband likes the likes of Divan. You know, the ones with soft-headboards. The other, dragged my heroes down to PWTC to check out some beds at the Perfect Living Expo. We found in one of the flyers, a Divan bed but with a wooden headboard. So, i said to husband, this is our gain. He agreed. So, we have to go check the thing out at the showroom. All we need is a bed and prolly a TV *husband wants an LED TV. huhuhu. I am more interested to getting some if not all lights in the house changed! kuangkuangkuang! Nak la yang modern sikit dak? Owh owh.. and curtains and drapes. Sheeshh.. Ze most challenging of all. lastly the garden. Nak tanam rumput depan and belakang. But, the husband baru je racun. in a week or two lah baru leh get the rumput ditanam. I am happy with the progress. Although it costs us a bomb to get the house live-able, but biasala. Pindah rumah orang kata. hehehe.. 

3rdly, some 3 weeks ago, we had a little accident. It was not really a little one. Horror jugakla. But we are fine. I slipped of a flight of stairs (7steps to be exact) while carrying hamza down to the kitchen. Don't ask me why I carried him coz the little guy can climb down the stairs on his own. Anyways. Hamza ended up with a 'bincut' on the side of his head and as for his mama, she suffered some abrasions on the left part of her body. Knee and shin to be exact. She thought she broke her arm. Alhamdulillah tidak. But now, she's down with a severe back pain. hehehe.. 

Ada lagi? Errr.. dunno what else to update. sekian sahaja untuk kali ini..

Toodles!

Up n Down

Lame betol dok tengok blog nih,selame ini org puang yang uruskang..dok ape jugo sekali sekala hambe pulok tekan keyboard, ke guane??

Up:
Went to our new house this afternoon to do some cleaning, done with both floors. Met a few neighbours, diorg sume young couple like us yang anak baru sorg and they all very kind..Alhamdullilah...Currently tgh nak install kitchen cabinet. Got the service from In-Cube Kitchen..Hopefully the work will be done by next week..

Down:
Kereta bini broke down time sampai umah baru, wiring problem. The 'women' melompat keluar kereta sambil fire!fire!..lotih den donga!i said what can we do??stay away...hopefully it wont boom..and Alhamdulillah...we're lucky...aku beranikan diri juga buka hud kereta..and memang that time api tgh marak...my wife already on her way to get the fire extinguisher, but aku dah jirus dulu ha henjin tu dgn air..and pulled out the battery cable..the thing is,cable bateri tu yang rosak,naked..may be that sparked and ignited the fire.

Tu je la..harap pempuan tu browse thru, and edit pe2 yang patut, xreti ambe nok tulih panjang lebor..

WS

Ramadhan

We are already into the second week of Ramadhan. I hope it is still not too late to wish everyone Selamat Menyambut Ramadhan. So far, I have not missed a day Alhamdulillah. Breastfeeding wise, I still breastfeed the little Simba. Thirsty of course. But, its a no biggie for me. Tamar? Makan juga. But not in large amount. Kadang-kadang je pun infact. So, yeah. But, I  do give him the bottle although occasionally. Although, I was a bit worried about fasting at first. Worried my milk wouldn't be enough for the little Simba. But, as the days of Ramadhan passed, I think I am doing quite alright. Alhamdulillah. This is my experience though.

So far, there's always food at home, syukur to Allah. Either we go buy it from the Bazaar Ramadhan, or my mom cooks (most of the time). These are the must haves during Iftar. A box of Deglet Nour Tamar (for the father especially), Murtabak daging, Samosa, cekodok pisang, keropok lekor (for hubby), 1 kuih manis, usually onde-onde or kaswi/lapis/seri muka. The main course is Rice and lauk-pauk. The husband prefers variety in his Iftar menu. He'll come home with 'mee goreng, ayam golek, Ikan bakar sambal, nasi kerabu, nasi beriyani, burgers, laksa', things like that. Yesterday he requested for nasi goreng. Thank you Allah. There's always more than enough for the family to eat during Iftar. What do u usually have for Iftar?

Our favourite Bazaar Ramadhan is of course, in Section 6 KD. Takdela best sangat. Tak banyak sangat variety pon. But, plainly because we are so used to going to that place to get food for Iftar. Every year without fail. heh.

This coming Thursday, we'll head back to Terengganu to be with my in-laws. In Terengganu, the food takde la banyak sangat beza. The choice of food, plus minus la. Cuma, orang Ganu suka makan ikan bakar sambal. Usually, Talapia bakar. The fish comes in all sizes, and the price varies based on the size of the fish. And, it's just yummy. Another dish they have in abundance at almost all bazaar ramadhan is, ayam golek. Banyak! fuuuhh.. Can't wait. Of course we will always allocate our time to be with both families, am I right? That reminds me, we have to go find Baju Melayu and Kain Pelikat for Aboh. Abang! Jangan lupa!

Its 15 to 8 in the morning. I am sleepy already. I'd better go before the little simba starts to roar, although in a cute way! Salam

koh koh.. *Batuk*

This whole post was drafted in June. But I didn't bother to post it. But since Aimi dah bising, qouting her 'asal bukak J o e, asal bukak J o e'. Therefore, to start it off, nah mi! :)

Berhabuk. 

Tiba-tiba hari ni terasa nak update. A lot has happened from the time I last blogged. A lot! Happy ones first ye? First, Hamza turned 1 year old, 21st of July 2010. How time flies. He was this small thing, so helpless and the only thing he could do was, cry, eat, smile a bit, poo and wee wee. 1 year later, this little blessing from Allah, He can walk, he can say bird, beh (as in bebeh our cat) fish, balloon. I am so grateful to Allah, for we are blessed with a healthy son. I wanted to hold a birthday party for him, but we have to wait for his Neyna to come back from UK. Not a real birthday party, more or less la. 

Second, we have turned 2 this year, 4 days after Hamza's birthday is our Anniversary. Didn't get to celebrate either. No one to babysit the little guy. huhuhu.. Nak movie pun xsempat. What more a romantic dinner. kui kui kui. Despite not getting to do what other normal husbands and wives do, I am happy enough to be blessed with a husband who never gives up on me. Melayan kerenah to the max! We do have quarrels or disagreement between us. But, that is just a fact of life. And best of all, he loves me for who I am. And of course I love him for every single thing that made him. Good or bad. I couldn't ask for a better husband. Thank you Allah.

Third, my mother is back from UK, after having spent a good 2 months 2 weeks in the Land of the Queen. She's back. My dad is the happiest man on earth. I can see that in his eyes. My mom, came home with a luggage full of shoes and clothes for us, not forgetting toys for Hamza. That's the best part yo! Cukup lengkap. My mom and I now take turns to cook dinner. Hehehe. 

Work wise, I think i'll pass. Nothing interesting to share really. Hhuuhuhuh. *kami hanya menjalankan tugas tanpa rasa cinta kerana kami adalah pekerja yang sering dikecewakan. hurmm.. Until the next entry

J o e

As of now, the son is asleep, and I am waiting for his baba to come back. Its 11 pm, and he's still not back yet. The one thing I have to adapt to. But, I have more odd hours shifts than the husband does. Times like these, usually happens once a month or once in every 2 months. So, I am not complaining. 

A few nights ago, I woke up at 3 am, watching football *it was Brazil vs Mexico? yeah. I woke up to feed Hamza but coz I couldnt bring myself to sleep, so I had typed 2 paragraphs of updates. But, I deleted it. With all intent and purpose. and I don't remember what I had typed. Booo.

Oh yeah. So I was busy thinking of what to write, I actually went thru my old posts and I found one. It was about me being so worried about Hamza not wanting to take the bottle especially when I have to the graveyard shift. And, I was shocked that, the husband actually commented and it was some sort of assurance that things will be alright, and thus I shouldn't worry too much. 

Reading it again, sebak. I was in tears. Terharu.

Last friday, something happened at the workplace. Being the unlucky ones, *almost all the time I'll have to do 2 nightshifts for the month of July. 25 hours. I came home crying. trying to explain why i was so upset.  Upon seeing me crying, he somehow understood my frustration and worries almost immediately. I didn't have to explain anything to him. Again, the husband assured me that he can handle the son alone. It was just too much for me to handle. I cried, and he was there to comfort me. Although I know when the day comes, It'll be different altogether *hehehe but I am most glad and grateful to Allah. I am definitely blessed with a loving and understanding husband. 

He's definitely not the romantic husband. He doesn't do surprises, although there were few surprises from him. But, him being just the way he is, is just perfect for me and I am so grateful to Allah. :)

The husband is back. 12.00am. and I am so happy! toodles.

Strep Throat

Not me, not the husband. But the little guy. I was shocked when the Doctor said that to me yesterday. Hamza has throat infection. *ingatkan demam nak tumbuh gigi je. Anyways, yesterday was abit chaotic for me because I had to look after Hamza. His last recorded temperature was 38 Degree. Dia pernah demam sebelum nih. Same symptoms.. High grade fever, no cough, no cold. But this time, he has diarrhoea as well. So, the infection confirms the diarrhea. 

But, that is not all u see. It's alot more than to just live the day with a sick child. As for myself, I am a working mummy. I work 8-5pm everyday and I am not complaining. Infact, I love what I am doing. *walaupon gaji tak sebesar mana. But, I work in a Hospital. Dan I deal with all the Intensive Care Units. U name it. CCU, ICU, NICU, HDW, and Burn Unit. And ICU alone can make me go home late everyday. Usaikan lagi yang lain lain di atas. 

U'd think that it's easier to take leave if the child is not well. wrong. They will kejar you, make you feel bad for not going to work. Esok cuma mock accreditation. What's the point of having it if kita ni dah tip top sangat? This is the time to know which area or where we are lacking. correct? No? 

But, I have promised my boss that I will make sure that everything will be ready for tomorrow. I hope Hamza will be better today and tomorrow. *Esok baba dia jaga dia coz I had to come in to work tomorrow. sedih kan? But, it's okay. Demi kerja. ye x?

Kadang-kadang I wished I am a stay at home mom! But, come to think of it again, I dont wan't to be a SAHM. I'd just put my degree to waste.  So, okay. I have to get some work done.

Just Updates

waahh.. asik update je sejak dua menjak ni. Sebabnya, baru ada cerita nak diceritakan. huhu. Cukup-cukupla cerita pasal Hamza, ye dak?

Updates on the House..

Alhamdulillah, we have collected the documents needed for our house loan from the State Land Office PJ, early today. We are so grateful to the 'Pentadbir Tanah of PJ' kerana mempercepatkan proses meluluskan kebenaran memindah milik dan Menggadai. Alhamdulillah. Syukur. We then drove straight to Putrajaya to submit the documents.  I was a bit frustrated tho because the Officer who was supposed to prepare the 'surat lulus pinjaman' was on leave. They asked us to come tomorrow (today) instead. So, hopefully things will turn out smoothly for us this time around. InsyaAllah.

Next time, you must do a thorough homework when buying a house. Especially, when buying a second hand house instead of the developer. Banyak issues. Serious. Haih. Learnt my lesson. But, I won't give up. That's the spirit, kan? huhu.

Anyways, something happened on our way back from Putrajaya. hahaha.. makes me laugh when i think of it. My husband, he's a very particular person and lives by the same routine, everyday. Antaranya la kan (I must not share everything, though) he will always make sure that there's enough credit in his Touch N Go card. He uses the Smart Tag day in day out. He condemns those who do not want to invest in the Smart Tag because queuing is a sheer waste of time, he said. True enough. But, I was the last one to drive his car during the weekends. He had less than RM 10 in his Touch n Go card. When we exited into Putrajaya, he had RM3 to be exact.

On our way back, I said to him 'Masuk je la Smart Tag, nanti top up kat KD'. He refused. He took the ticket instead. Putrajaya to KD, xde la jauh sangat. Very straightfoward journey. But, he decided to re-fuel at Damansara. And I don't know what happened. By the time we were about to reach KD, I asked him for the ticket. And then the Drama!! 

He lost the tix!! Siap benti tepi jalan. Made me call the petrol station and at the same time searched for in the car, hi and lo. Habis semua punggah. Siap suruh susun semua receipt2 dia. hahaha. After 10 minutes of searching, he gave up. And you know, we had to pay RM 47.50!!! Itu serupa pegi JB, kan? Haih.. Gilo gilo! Muncung kejap my husband and termenung after that. hihii.. memang bukan rezeki la duit tu, coz the petrol pump staff called us back saying that they couldn't find it. But I am sure the thing tercicir kat petrol pump tu. ahahhaa. Poor husband.

Belum habis lagi....

Then we went to Giant, to renew our driving Licence. And, suddenly he opened my bag and mengorek2. 'what are you doing' I asked. He replied 'Cari tiket. Mana tau Ya tersimpan dalam bag ke.' I laughed immediately. Kalau la tiket tu ada dalam my hangbag, memang aku kena lecture 3 hari 3 malam. hahaha. I replied 'Saje je la tu, nak cari benda nak kenakan orang' and he laughed. my darling husband...

okla, nnt sambung lagi. gotta go! ciao

When the lions roar!!!!

Enjoy Hamza and His Lion in action!!

Tadaa!!

  

Walking with his Lion

  

tergelak- gelak

 

 ala.. terlanggar dinding!

 

Dahla tu Mama. Hamza penat..

Tag Pertama!

Okay, Sid.. Aku nak berterus terang. Aku tak pernah ditag dan tak pernah membuat tag. Oleh itu, aku amat berbesar hati untuk membuat tag ini. :p


1) Apa yang anda akan buat bila anda tahu member anda tikam belakang anda?
Hmmm... mula-mula berasa sedih dan kecewa... lepas tu akan berasa sedikit marah. Pastu akan mengabaikan aje. dah tu, xkan nak pegi sound orang tu pulak kot?



2) 6 orang di hati anda?
1. Joe
2. Hamza
3. Mama & Abah
4. Ma & Aboh
5. Ameer Muadz
6. Anfaal
7. Hammam,
8. Fatihah
9. Iqbal
10. Adik beradik (kahkahkah)

terpaksa lah lebih daripada 6 orang. :p

3) Anda rasa anda comel?
tak.. hahahaah.

4) Single or taken?
Taken.



5) Blog yang anda suka?
a)thepinkstilettos
b)shilashower
c)mividaei (my friend's)

6) Adakah bilik anda kemas setiap hari?
Yes, kecuali weekends. tapi masih ada attempt to keep it tidy. 
 

7) Lagu terakhir yang anda dengar?
what do you want from me by Adam Lambert

8)Last text message?
xhengat la pulak..

9). Last phone call?
Aliaa-suruh pegi drop in check kat Ambank. Lupa dik! sorry!

10) Hari terakhir anda menangis?
hurmm... bukan dalam seminggu dua ni la. xhengat.. ahah! hari Khamis 13/5/2010. Hari 1st hantar Hamza ke nursery. sedih.. sob sob

11) List lima color favorite anda?
purple, brown, yellow, red, green
 
12) Orang terakhir anda ber-YM?
mama, last night

13) Game paling anda suka?
The sims 2 and sims 3.. Boleh 1 hari tak mandi mengadap game nih.

14) Adakah anda peminat MCR?
haah sid. MCR tu apa?

15) Apa perasaan anda jawab tag ni?
xde apa-apa perasaan.

16) Anda rasa tag ini best?
biasa je untuk 1st tag yang saya buat.

Tag lagi 10 orang
xkot. sape-sape yang terhengen nak buat tag ni, sila lah. 

oleh kerana hari dah lewat, Goodbye! 

Walk baby...

Yes. I think he'll start standing and walking soon. But, I don't know how soon, soon is. We bought him a trike walker a month ago. I wouldn't say he hated it. But, he was not so interested to use it, like stand and push it around. He was more interested in pressing the lion's nose, because it the lion sings and the nose will light up when u press on it. Hahahaha.. And believe it or not, he preferred his high chair over the lion. 

My favourite highchair

:)

aiyaaaahhh.. bangun baby!

 I am Standing Mama!!

I want to walk!

 Hamza pushing his highchair

My son started standing when he was 5 months plus close to 6 months. But, I think he's taking his own time to strengthen his jelly feet. No rush baby.. No rush.. But I am happy with his progress.

Last night, his Tok Babah held him by his hands and walked with him round the table. This little simba here shrieked in excitement. But then it was his dinner time. So, after completing 1 round around the table his Tok Babah gave him to me. And you guessed??

HE CRIED!!

I asked his Tok Babah to walk with him again, and he smiled and laughed almost immediately and throughout his 'walk' with his Tok Babah. ahahaha. 

Take him to his Lion bah, I said.

And true enough. Hamza stood and started pushing it around and making all sorts of weird sounds or shriek  at the same time. He was super excited. He refused to stop pushing his Lion. He made rounds and rounds of walking with his Lion. Hahahaha.. Cute! We will have to give extra encouragement to Hamza.

Anyways, I know he's going to turn 11 month soon. But, No rush baby. Mama and Baba loves you so much. So, to those who reads this blog, if you have a child/children, when did your child started walking? Share la sekali.

He went Sugar High!

I was performing my solat, when I heard Hamza playing with some plastic bags. I was worried. 'Dapat plastic bag apa la si kenit ni' I said in my heart. After I finished my prayers, I found him doing this!!!!

He was busy munching the candies and its wrappers!! OMG!! Bahaya!!! But, I maintained calm. I checked his mouth. Tiada apa-apa. And the fact that he was too busy wanting to munch on the candy wrapper again, I let him. I did found an unwrapped candy on the floor. Cepat-cepat makan! sebelom this little guy finds it! Yeah. Look what sort of mess he's created in our room!

Look at me mama!!! I am eating chocolate mama!

One for you mama!

sedap mama!!

 

 kirai kirai!!

mama!! come play with me!

That's how he looked like after having had some candies. Heyyy anak aku! hahahha.. he looked so cute. I so can't get enough of this photo! loves..

Toodles

Kisah Kasut

I don't really spending for a really good pair of shoes. That's what i always tell my husband. :) and true enough, he bought himself a really good pair some couple of weeks ago. He bought a Timberland. I must admit that it was a very good buy. Its comfortable, made of leather, and he can use it to work. *we work 5 days a week. haruslah menggunakan kasut yang selesa. 

Now, I need a pair of shoes if not two or more. muhahahha.. thing is, I am done with the likes of V*incci. No offence. But, I so need a pair of comfortable shoes. So, today, I dragged my two heroes to One Utama for shoe hunting. Kuikui.. *love love*. Passed by clarks. Walked in and was checking out some shoes. At the end of it, u guess???

We bought 1 pair for Hamza instead.. :( 

Although, although it was a good buy. Then we walked into U Parkson. Tiba-tiba beli pulak perfume. Hmmm... Pastu dah malas dah nak browse. Checked out Jaya Jusco. But, susah sebenarnya when u have found what u wanted. kan? This is what i want. Can I have both?? Please don't make me choose this time.

Here they are...

Pretty

sweet.. I love..

each of these, would cost me RM225. But, to be honest, I don't mind paying. At all.. 

And, before I end it all, we singgah Giant to get Hamza towel murahan untuk kegunaan di nursery.. Maka, sekiranya lunyai, xdela mak and bapak dia nak menyesal.. huhuhu.. sekian sahaja

Family Outing

Next week, husband will be away for 4 days, leaving me and little Hamza behind. *sob sob sob* But this whole week, both of us have been working so hard, we hardly have time for each other, even for little Hamza. A lot of things happened, and indeed it was a super tiring week for us all. But I didn't want to just stay home. So, after 1 whole afternoon of burying ourselves under the duvet, I persuaded husband to take both of us out. But, where to go? OU? We go there almost every weekend. We don't fancy places like KLCC and Sunway Pyramid. We love convenience. The Curve? Naaah..

Why don't we try Bangsar Shopping Center? I asked Husband

Ada apa sana? He asked

I am not sure. But i know they have a huge mothercare there. I said

What do you want to buy from mothercare? he asked

I just wanna have a look. And since we don't wanna go to OU, lets just see what they have there. I said.

OK. go get ready. He said. 

530p.m, we arrived at BSC. A very quiet mall. And we went straight to the second floor. They have The Times Bookstore there. aaaaahh, best!!! Husband bought himself 2 storybooks. Heheheh. Then, we went into mothercare, check out some stuff. Didn't buy anything though. Barang-barang Hamza dah banyak, plus he grows so fast. So, yeah. We did buy him a few pieces of baju and present for our friends (aimi and Rad) for their new addition. 

We left BSC at 7pm. Wanted to go to i-City, Shah Alam. The crowd??MADNESS!!! I thought there were food outlets there. Malangnya, tiada kedai yang buka. So, i said to husband, lets just go find something to eat. The lights, memang indah. But I was to hungry to enjoy the colourful lights. Husband couldn't agree more. 

We went round Shah Alam, *at the same time, reminisce the times when we were in Uni. Kuikui. Kasi can la jiwang-jiwang sikit. Good for the relationship, kan?? Then i remembered Nasi Lemak Jati. I asked husband to go find it. Terhingin pulak! And ADA LAGI!!! OMG! we bought 2 bungkus for ourselves. *Nafsu gila!! We had dinner at Tasik Shah Alam *sempat lagi! and left for home around 10p.m. 

All in all, I would say, I enjoyed it. Husband too. Hoping for more quality time with my little family after this. Minta maaf, kerana entry ini agak hambar sebab kami tertinggal camera. Maka, tiada gambar. Till then, toodles

Kehilangan

The memory is still fresh in my mind. The memory of losing someone I love. The memory of how I felt when receiving the news too is still fresh even though it happened 7 years ago. Disbelief. Shocked. Denial. Confused. My best friend died in a car accident. It took me a long time to recover.  

A couple of days ago, another similar news came. Husband's ex-colleague who is also a good friend to me and husband passed away due to dengue shock. It was basically another round of mixed feelings. Sad, disbelief, denial, but at the same time, trying to understand and letting go, believing that this is by all means, Qada' and Qadar. All the memories of my late friend resurfaced, although they died of different causes. Today, looking through my facebook, friends are putting up her pictures, their last times together, their last happy moments with her and many left comments as well. They want to keep the memories of her close to their hearts and most of all, they do not want to forget her.

I am still taken aback my the news. Especially now that I have a family of my own. I have a little one who is so dependent on me. My little baby Hamza. As well as a loving husband. I cannot imagine if I lose any of them or even what will happen to them if I become the first to leave this world? 

To the family of our late friend, Zarina bt Abdul Ghafir, all our condolences for your loss. Lets make prayers to those who have passed, al-Fatihah.

Goodbye

I am at home now. It's Friday lunch break. That explains the updating. Anyways, life has been good, Alhamdulillah. Hamza has 2 teeth now. I am more than happy. *tapi gerun pun ada juga! Habis la mama! He is on a different note, active than ever. He loves to play, hates to be left alone. Now, making sounds like maaa.. baaa.. taaaa.. and his vowels, complete. a e i o u. semua bunyi dah ada. Alhamdulillah.

So, what brings me to update my little space here? My assistant. I have an assistant, and all i can say is,  she is SUPER GOOD in doing her job. Reliable, creative, independent, and best of all she make a good friend too. Thing is, she applied for a transfer to Perak some months ago. Of course I am aware of that. Then, today the Perak Health department called, asking her to report-in this very Monday. I know she's very very happy. Who wouldn't? If I were her, I'd be jumping of joy! But, I am not her, and now, i am left with none. What a shame. I am sad, beyond words. Of course there will be replacements. But it'll never be the same. hurmmm. 

I know I am so not ready for goodbyes just yet, but I've always known that THIS will come. and the day has come indeed. Today. Nak buat macam mana, ye dak?

If you are reading this, I'd like to say thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for the memories, the joy, laughters, semua la that we've gone through together as rakan kerja. Thank you for being a very good assistant and thank you for being a friend to me. I appreciate it so much and I hope you will enjoy your new workplace and best of all, I know you'll enjoy being around with your family members. :) Until we meet again. Kiss the babies for me.

till then, toodles

Pregnant again?

AM I??

*

*

*

*

*
*
*

*
*

*
*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

:)

NO

Seriously, I am not pregnant.

I seriously think that nowadays, Peer-pressure is a huge factor in baby-making. Not those who have just gotten married. I am talking about second pregnancy here. It's a no big issue here afterall. But, yeah, after reading through some blogs and seeing that many are getting pregnant again, I too feel like wanting to get pregnant again. So, THAT is what i am talking about here. Peer pressure. But, then again, it CAN NOT be just about peer pressure. It hit me just now, 

'They are all my age and are having babies, again. I think i am ready for another baby'

The BIG Question here is

AM I??

Am i really ready to have another baby?

There are many other things to consider before actually planning to have another baby. At least, this is how i think it should be. No offence to those who 'accidentally' got themselves pregnant again. :) For now, i consider myself lucky the fact that my beloved mother WANTS to care for Hamza while we're away at work. And infact, we live with my parents. So it's not such a headache to find Hamza a nursery/caregiver. It will be, soon. haih. takpe. nanti fikir. Eventhough, to be honest really, never in my life have I want my mother/parents to be the caregiver of my children. Reason being is, they are not the young people like we are. That's it. But, i have to let go because my mother insisted and she insisted. Sometimes i wished i am a stay-at-home-mom, neither do i want to just keep away my degree in the cupboard just like that.

My parents had 5 children in 6 years. Ye. kami la anak-beranak yang berderet 5 orang bila pergi Kamdar ataupun Globe Silk Store zaman dulu. macam-macam perangai tak usah cakap la kan? Sometimes i wonder how my parents managed it? When we ask, they'd say.. we just do what we have to do. Amazing. Kitorang bukan nak tolak rezeki. Tidak langsung. Of course we want to have more children. Until we have settled in our new home, i guess we can start planning on having another baby. Ye ke bang? hehe. As for now, keinginan is only a feeling of wanting to have something. It shouldn't solely be about wanting.

I want to enjoy my baby first because i have quite bad morning sickness when i was carrying Hamza. So, if i get pregnant now, i am afraid that he won't be getting enough attention from me. On top of that i still want to breastfeed him. when i have wean him off properly, i know it's time to give him a brother or a sister. :) And to top it all up, I am grateful to Allah for everything that we are blessed with.

Hamza's calling for mama. :) Toodles

Baby Steps

 Hamza Jatuh Katil... LAGI! :(

Yes and i am not kidding. It was an incredible week for all of us, including Hamza. He fell off the bed, AGAIN (yeah, i know what's on your mind already but let me just finish this off) and this time, i panicked. He was asleep when i left him. thing is, the bed is only some 5 steps away from the dining table (room is right next to the dry kitchen) I dah kepung-kepung him with bantal, although i know it wasn't enough. And yes, I underestimated him. I thought he'd sleep longer. I was dead wrong. I even left the door ajar. Unfortunately.. :( And then, 'the cry'! My mother was 'Hamza jatuh katil!!! Oh no!!' true enough, I found him on the floor and crying in pain. Worse, his nose was bleeding. It didn't bled out, but you could see that there were blood in his nostrils. I panicked! *seb baik husband tenang sikit. We just had to take him to hospital. We brought some ice to cold compress the nose. Alhamdulillah, Hamza is fine. We took him home.

 By the time we reached home, He was already feeling and cheerful and excited. I was traumatised! I don't dare to put him on the bed. So i put him in the cot. Much to our surprise, Hamza started to stand in his cot. Sila rujuk 3 gambar terakhir dalam previous entry. Ye, dia baru baik dari jatuh katil. And, he just refused to sit. Ada incidents dia terhantuk hidung kat cot. Hmmm. But we couldn't do much. We could only observe him, because he was just so determined and excited. All of these happened just 3 days before he turned 7 months. Alhamdulillah.

My little baby is a big boy and very determined, i can see. Since that day, whenever i put him in his cot, he'd reach out for the side of the cot and pull himself up. He'd play with his reflections in the mirror, talk to his reflections, laugh a bit and when he's tired, he'd make small cries. Mintak tolong make him sit/ carry him. Clever. When i pray, i'll put him on the floor right next to me. A few days ago, he would just sit and kadang-kadang pegang my telekung. Now? He's found joy in making a mess. He'd pull his toy basket or worse, he'd pull out all his creams and botol minyak out of its bakul. And to date, he's polished up his crawling skills. Ye sudah LAJU!!! and best of all, He can already go round his cot (meniti). My mother says, he'll make small cries when he's tired and wants to sit or when he couldn't get something (e.g. bila ada bantal/ comforter dah bergulung and dia xboleh crawl) But whenever he was able to overcome the problems, he'd smile gleefully and cheer for himself. Amazing. My son. Other than that, he has also started to express his likes and dislikes and wants. And he too understands us. *susah nak explain disini.  Buat-buat je la faham ye? :)

Yes, of course i am happy with Hamza's incredible developments. Everyday, i'd gloom for having to leave Hamza for work. I wish i can be there for him all the time. Tapi, this is life. And I thank Allah for all the blessings. I so enjoy being a mommy! Walau begitu, I believe that lain babies, lain personality and lain development. For Hamza's case, He has 2 other cousins of the same age. Ye, Hammam and Ameer Muadz. And Alhamdulillah, the family tidak membezakan any of them. We enjoy them infact. I love to share mummy-baby experiences with my sisters. And i hope, when Hamza and his cousins (mama's and baba's side) dah besar, they'll love each other just like brothers and sisters. 

Okay, till then. Toodles.

 

 Smile baby!

 My little Imam?

Hamza's amazing progress

Hamza, our son started to turn (with confidence) only when he was 4 1/2 months. Still, he wasn't so comfortable lying on his tummy for long. Then, he learned to turn back to lying-on-his-back position. Alhamdulillah. I was happy to see his physical developements. On top of that, he can properly focus and grab anything in his way. He loves the TV remotes. huhu

At 5 1/2 months, he can flip/turn easily and has started to pull himself forward. *engsot-engsot je.. My husband came home saying that his colleagues daughter has started to crawl. Sometimes it hit me, slow ke anak aku? But, we decided not to push Hamza too hard just because anak orang lain dah boleh crawl. We should encourage him instead and we did.  When he was about to turn 6 months, he started to i shall say.. be in a crawling position. dia goyang kedepan kebelekang sikit.. laugh abit and do it again. He could also stabilize himself to properly sit. 

 

Hamza, duduk dengan jaya :)

2 week later, He tried to bring himself to sit from his crawling position. And he managed to achieve that too! Owh, alhamdulillah. My baby is a big boy now. He grows so fast! :) 6 months 3rd week, Hamza started to crawl. Dapatla setapak dua. he flips faster now and he loves to play!

 

crawl baby..

Today, 1 week before turning 7 months, he started to stand!! in his cot!! started out with him standing on his knees.. calling out for mama and baba. hehehe..

 

 on his knees

And then,this!

struggling hard!

5 minutes later!

dah berdiri!!

Aih, i love being a mommy!! i love to see Hamza grow. :) Now that he's alot more mobile, i really have to make sure that he's safe all the time. I love my little family! Thank you Allah!

Speechless

Langkawi..

.. a blast!